For the LOVE of everything...
Well, there was a long spell in there where I was...well lazy about updating some things. Long story short, life happened. Some of it good and some of it bad. Basically the motivation magic was at zero while I sorted some things.
I've been most active on Facebook with communication. Okay, okay - it's an addiction to sarcastic memes these days for the most part BUT I get real communicative in my reader's group with funny updates and several live videos. When I'm watching back through them I often wonder if I should have paid more attention to makeup tutorials and wonder why I laugh at five different octaves. There's absolutely no forgiveness for smeared eyeliner, bad lighting, a screeching cat or a very loose agenda on subject material when going live on Facebook. Don't get me started about trying to filter my language. Luckily you guys love me.
Speaking of...love is difficult enough without having to write it. I chose to write it because I think it's the backbone of what makes us human. It transcends everything else that may be going haywire with the world. Love is the one constant that we can choose to give and learn to receive.
I've posted (ranted) several blogs ago about modern romance books being far more about sex than the idea of love. My stance is still the same. However, I found myself a little adrift for a while (..a couple of years..) wondering what I loved or if I'd experienced the kind of love that I write about.
My heart has felt the whisperings of it, it's felt sorrow at the loss of it. But is it like what I write? I always have a difficult time expressing it when writing. My love for my children is constant but it's not quite the same thing when you meet someone. So what is it inside of us that pulls toward another person? Is it meant to change, grow, stay steadfast or beat slowly at times? I look at my parents and wonder how they've loved each other for 50 years and it's hard to imagine that it's been that burning excitement after 2 kids, multiple moves, arguments and a lot of annoyance along the way. And yet...they still love each other. There's a peacefulness about it when things aren't as hectic.
I think I'll take my mother's advice on the answer. She said we're meant to love people in different ways in our lifetime. Meaning, that the love you have for one person won't be like the love you have for the next person. It doesn't mean it's not as meaningful, only that it's different, because we're all different. And I'm sure it changes as we move along in life.
Right now, I've got ideas and 3 works in progress that I don't love just yet. They're steadily growing on me again though.